Okay, here it is, the quick and dirt on moving your growing one from a crib to a big kid bed. Blame the abbreviated nature of this post on Amy who is visiting (Woohoo! Hooray! Yee-HAW!) for a week...we have months to catch up on. =)
List form, love it.
1. We moved Sarah from a crib to a regular sized twin bed when she was 20 months for two reasons. First, because we were moving from Colorado to Alabama and it seemed like a logical time to make the switch and not have to set the crib up again. Second, because we were expecting again and new we'd have to do it sometime between 20 and 25 months or we'd be buying another crib and we're waaaaay to cheap to go that route.
2. When we first moved into our house we set up the pack n play in her new room as well as her new twin bed. If we hadn't moved and I were making the switch I would probably set the twin bed up while the crib was still in the room...just to ease the transition and let the little one get used to the big bed before having to sleep in it. Sarah LOVED playing on her new bed, reading on it, laying on it, snuggling with us on it, etc. But for about a week she still slept in her pack n play for naps and nights. After that week we put away the pack n play and told her she would be sleeping in her big girl bed tonight. I was sure not to ask her if she wanted to - making the move was our choice, not hers and I didn't want her to have veto power! I knew she wanted to sleep in the big bed but I didn't want to give her the chance to say "no"...what would I have done then? Instead I said something like, "Guess what?! Tonight you get to sleep in our BIG GIRL BED!"
3. After the pack n play was put away it was never to be seen again. No going back and forth, no threatening the crib, nothing. It was done. (incidentally, we did the same thing with diapers when we moved to panties - I know this approach is probably too sudden for some but it worked for us on both counts) There we definitely some days I wanted to put her back in the pack n play and storm out but I knew that would set us up for an even longer and harder battle.
4. The first night was perfect - no fussing, no getting out of bed. She went right to sleep. Second night, a little more of the same. The third night started the negotiating about wanting the door cracked, etc. We left the door cracked but after she started walking out of her room and coming to see us we had to close it. The good thing about putting her in the bed at 20 months was that she couldn't open the doors by herself yet so once she was in the room she had to stay there unless we got her up. I made sure to put all the toys away and out of sight before bed so she wouldn't be up playing.
5. There was one bad night when she got up and was clearly playing and acting crazy in her room. After several failed attempts to go in and get her settled down we had to just let her go. I was nervous she wouldn't realize that she had to get back in her bed to go to sleep but eventually she did. That never really happened again.
6. Logistics: Sarah's bed has a mattress and a box spring. The box spring is supposed to sit on slats that are placed on the bed rails to hold it up higher. We took the slats out and just laid the box spring on the floor with the mattress on top if it. This made the bed even lower to the ground which kept us from worrying quite so much about what would happen if she fell out. Also, we started out with a child's bed rail on the side (the other side was against the wall) but it actually ended up being more hazardous for us than just going without. She kept falling out of bed and onto her head as she tried to reach over the rail to get more books off her shelf. Finally we just took the rail off and put a bunch of pillows on the floor so if she did fall out it wouldn't hurt as bad.
7. Of course, she DID fall out. She's probably fallen out of bed 10 times in the last year since we moved her...about two weeks ago was the most recent time. It jars her a bit but by the time we get in there she's either already asleep or getting back in bed herself.
8. We have a stepstool similar to this one that helps Sarah get in and out of bed. A must-have in my opinion.
Okay, I think that's pretty much it. The most important thing for us was to be consistent in our expectations and routines. Of course there's been negotiating along the way (she gets to have her door cracked now, for example) but it's all worked out.
Hope that helps some of you!
Buddy Posters? anyone? anyone?
25 comments:
How fun! That was my question and I will be hitting refresh all day to see the advice.
I'm so glad you are doing this Mama Monday...we are going to be transitioning Max this week!!!
Loyal reader...first time responder! YAY! :D Both of our girls were transitioned to the BGB cold turkey and it worked so much better than I ever dared to hope for. Maybe I'll try the same approach with the younger's potty training. Hmmmm...
We went the toddler bed route at almost 17 months. Our bad thing is that I let her fall asleep with me in our bed and my DH moves her to her bed after she's asleep. We recently have gotten her to nap in her own bed but when we've tried at bedtime, it ends up in inconsolable tears so I give up!
Good Mama Monday topic since this is one of two of my parenting confusions as of late. I'm assuming you had her switched to the big girl bed before the potty training, so maybe someone else will jump in to help me...
My daughter just turned two, and I think she is ready for potty training, but she is still in her crib. I really don't want to do both potty training and big girl bed at the same time, but shouldn't she be in a regular bed first in case she has to go in the night? I have no clue what to tackle first, and if we wait on the potty training are we going to miss that window of oportunity if she is really ready now?
And now that I type all that out, I feel like I am definitely overthinking this. :o)
Megan right above me---
Nighttime potty training and daytime potty training are two entirely different things... most kids aren't ready for nighttime until way after they've mastered the day (it has more to do with physical development than will). So I would separate those issues as totally unrelated (the part about not being able to get out of bed to go.)
We considered a twin bed for Maddie when it was time to move her (sometime around 26 months for us) but we decided to go with the toddler bed, because the twin was just so enormous to us. We were really glad we did that. She was very good at staying in her room, though eventually figured out that she had free reign with her bookcase and made good use of that new freedom.
We were more concerned when we switched Gracie from crib to bed (maybe around... 27 or 28 months?) and we put up a safety gate on the outside of her door. In the house we lived in then our bedroom was on the first floor, kind of tucked away--and the girls were on the second floor. We didn't want her roaming around at night. The gate worked out really well--she could still open her door, but not escape--something we never had to worry about with Maddie, but definitely did with Gracie.
At four we moved Maddie from toddler bed to bunk beds (on the bottom at first, now she sleeps on both depending on the week) and Gracie will probably move to a double bed (because we have one that used to be a dedicated guest bed, but we don't have a dedicated guest room now unfortunately) sometime this summer (around 3.5 years). She is not a bed flopper like Maddie so I'm not worried at all that she'll fall out. Then the toddler bed will go into storage for a year until Bridget is ready for it. She will be the lucky recipient of a really nice headboard (the crib converts into a double bed) when she is done with the toddler bed, something like ten years after we bought it. It didn't occur to us immediately that we wouldn't be converting it any time soon!
We're getting ready to do this in the next couple of months and I'm already having nightmares about midnight pj parties in my kiddo's room. Crossing my fingers that it goes as smoothly for us as it did for you guys... thanks so much for the suggestions!
Ohhhh, I'll try and do a buddy post tonight when I have time to sit down and write it out...two kids transitioned so far and very different reactions/situations!
Another first-time responder, here. :) I have 3 kids, and their transitions have all been different, we're actually still in the process of transitioning our son, who's 3.
With my oldest daughter, who's now 9, she was in the crib until 17 months, when her sister got here, and we needed the crib for her. Then we moved her to a twin bed in the same room, and it went great. No problems, slept completely through the night, no trying to get up. Easiest kid I ever switched over, even with a new baby sister waking up through the night.
With my youngest daughter, now 7, she was in the crib until 11 months, when she started climbing out, and injuring herself in the process. After our second ER trip (for a busted nose as she fell flat on her precious face from the top of the side), we turned her crib into a toddler bed. Didn't go near as well, she wasn't quite a year old, and wasn't really ready, but we didn't know what else to do. She did much better when we moved, and we had 2 twin beds in their room. Partly because she was older (maybe 15 months) and partly, I think, because she thought of her twin bed as a "big girl" bed, so she was expected to act like a big girl. The crib was still her "baby bed".
With our son, we moved him to a toddler bed, not his crib converted, when he was 2. He hated it, wouldn't even nap in it, and spent every night for the next year in the chair in our room. *sigh* (the chair in our room, with the ottoman pushed up to it, is the same size as a toddler bed, and the arms act as guardrails). It was my DH's "study" chair-he's a youth/children's pastor, and here's where he writes sermons and plans his agenda for Sundays and Wednesdays. Our little man took it over, and refused to let anyone sit in it for the past year. So, when we moved (yes, again-we do that a lot) back to TX a few weeks ago, I knew we were finally going to have a 4 bedroom house, which meant all 3 kids finally had their own space. Just in time-our daughters were hating each other, and our son was making our sleeping situation miserable. He'd start out in the chair, end up in bed with us (in a queen bed, with a 6'4 DH who insists on sleeping sideways so his feet don't hang off the bed). DH has joint pain (fibromyalgia) anyway, and a 3 year old sleeping sideways in bed with us was making him almost crippled. So, when we got ready to move, I made a big deal with each of the kids, that they'd have their own rooms, and they could decorate any way they want. Any way. The girls both picked something perfect for their personalities (a room for a princess for my oldest, a rockstar theme for my youngest), and DS is obsessed with dinosaurs right now, so that's what he chose. We picked out bedding, pillows, wall art together, and he got super excited about his "bi' boy room". When we moved a few weeks ago, we started putting rooms together (though there's still a lot to do), and he's been doing really good staying asleep in his bed through the night, after I rock him to sleep in my arms. He still naps on our couch in the LR, though. Last night, we though we'd try actually putting him down in his bed to go to sleep, and he did great. Bedtime routine of story, prayers, kisses, and we went out for a few minutes. Came back in, and he was sound asleep. This is our last one, so I was filled with a mixture of "way to go, buddy-ro!" (yes, we have one of those, too) and "where'd my baby go?". Slept all night long, til 10am. We'll see how he does tonight.
I wrote a novel! Maybe next time it'll be easier to do this on my blog, and link it. :) Glad to finally be participating, though!
20 months was the magic number for us! We didn't plan it that way, but now that I look back, all 3 of my kids went to a big bed at that age!
My oldest was 18 mos when we had twins. We kept him in his crib (because we didn't want him to feel like it was taken by the babies & we weren't about ready to get 3 cribs!) and the twins shared a crib until they were too big. That's when we made the switch-a-roo. We just set up the big boy bed one morning, told him he had a big boy bed now, and that was that. Smooth as honey. He fell out a few times, but that was it.
The twins had their big beds set up in their rooms for several months before we moved them over. Jude had not one problem. This really surprised me given his roudy, out-going and "testy" personality.
My daughter was a different story. We put her in a big queen bed (heirloom) but she got down anyway. I'm also one to stick to my guns and man was I mad when she got out of bed 12 times a night! I wanted that crib back so badly! But we just put her back to bed instantly EVERY time and told her it was NOT okay to get out of her bed. It took her a week to figure out how to get her door open and I about lost it! Another week later she was doing great! I guess she just finally realized we meant business! My advice would be not to give in! They need to test what their new boundaries are, and we're the ones who have to show them.
My story is almost the same, except we weren't moving houses, just rooms. We went cold turkey also. We were expecting our second (who just arrived last Thursday!), so we made our guest room into our then 21 month old daughters room. We played up the fact that we were getting her a big girl bed and talked about all her older cousins and friends who slept in "big girl beds." We decorated her room and let her play in it for a while before she slept in there for the first time. I was dreading the transition, as she was such a good sleeper and I wasn't sure if I was ready to give up my sleep at night. But she did wonderful. I started with a nap. I laid down with her and read her a story and then we talked about her staying in her bed, I walked out of the room, she cried for maybe a minute and then she went to sleep. It was literally that easy! I tried it again that night, she did great and we have never gone back.
We do have a bed rail and we have never had trouble with it. Her bed has slats, so we didn't use a box spring (the bed rail still works great) and we use that exact stool from Target.
This is a great post...three months too late for me, but a great topic!
Both my boys went from crib to twin at a little over a year. Essentially once they were big enough to get on and off the bed alone. I taught them that the proper way to get off was laying on their belly with the legs going off first. They started with a rail on one side (other against the wall) just until they were use to the bed. My oldest was great - he never got up once he was put to bed until he woke up in the morning then came in for some snuggle time. My youngest was a stinker for a couple of weeks. Would always get up and mess around over and over. Usually I'd just say "Get back in bed!" from my room and you could hear him scramble back up. This only lasted a couple of weeks then he was good.
Your story sounds so similar to ours. We moved our son at 22 months, because we moved and didn't want to set up the crib again either, but our pack and play removal didn't go as smoothly as yours, he climbed out of the pack and play one day during his nap and landed with a loud smack on the floor and for him, that was it, the pack and play gave him owies and he wanted to be a big boy. We still had some struggles, but all in all, it worked out for the best,other than the poor bruise on his forehead for a day or two.
Love the Mama Mondays, keep them coming!
My daughters big girl bed should be here in the next few weeks. Your post is perfect timing. Although I secretly wish it was a few weeks from now so I could have buddy posted. I'm still hoping to one of these weeks. Thanks for the awesome information as usual!
Just thought I'd add that DS went down for a nap in his own bed 2 hours ago, and is still there. Getting ready to go wake him up, but it seems like we've reached a turning point, and he's ready to sleep in his own bed now. :)
um yah, i won't be buddy posting on this one. my girls have finally started sleeping in their own beds at 8 and almost 7...
and that doesn't include the fact that they fall asleep in my bed first and i move them....
i know i know. i shouldn't do it. but i do.
!
tara
Thanks Erin...
Just a thought... have you ever posted about potty training? We are a cold turkey method kind of people (like you) so I would love to hear what you did. Did you give rewards for going on the potty? How old was she?
Thanks again!
Thanks for all the ideas you guys! I love Mama Mondays! I'm glad this seems to be a timely post for some of you.
Lisa, if you check the sidebar there's a mama monday section over there...with a link to a potty training post. There's TONS of good advice in the comments section and from buddy posters. Hope it helps!
I kept all of my 4 kids in thier cribs until they could climb out. I don't know why I did it this way, it just seemed logical to me...they were content in their cribs so why rock the boat sort of thing. Their ages varied...DS was 2, DD#1 was 2.5, DD#2 was 18months, and DD#3 was 2. I opted to go the toddler bed route and we made a HUGE deal about them getting their beds....They came with us to pick it out and got to pick a special sheet set and pillow. We took pictures of them getting all set for bed and tucked in. They were SOOO excited.
For the first week we had the regular visit within 20 minutes of putting them to bed, but we NEVER had a night-time visit, mainly because they all slept through the night 99% of the time anyway.
When they would come to visit, we would do much like the Supernanny's bed time routine....said it's bed time once and put them back to bed...no other conversation no matter how many times they came out, which was rarly more than twice.
By the end of the week it was a done deal.
We transitioned Katie to her big girl bed when she was around 28 months I guess. Number 2 is on the way...we are getting ready to put our house on the market and JC Penney's was having their big furniture sale haha! So we just went for it. It was so smooth I'm stil shocked. I started by taking the front rail off her crib months and months ago and just had a safety rail. Then when the big girl bed came she was so excited and we haven't looked back. I haven't had many issues with her getting out. She never gets out of her bed even during naps and I have no clue why but she just doesn't. She'll just yell for me when she wakes up...so funny. I think the worst was that she got out of bed to get some books during a nap and ended up tearing the book to shreds...grr. I can't say I have much advice because she hasn't thrown us any curve balls and I'm not complaining!
This is a very timely post for me as well, as my 2 year old just climbed out of the bed for the first time last night. We just got back from vacation and while we were in Florida she hated the crib that we rented so she would make us rock her to sleep every night. Which is so unlike her. Usually we read 3 books with a dim light, turn the light off, talk for a bit, and she says "put you in bed mommy". And from there she talks herself to sleep. She has alway been so easy. I don't know what to make of this new situation. She screamed like I've never heard her scream last night when I put her in bed and then she climbed out and fell on the floor. She wasn't hurt but it scared us. I always said that we would make the switch when she was able to climb out on her own, but now with the new screaming at bedtime, I'm not sure what to do. By the way, her bed is a convertable, the front comes off and a short rail with a small opening goes on. Again, thanks for the post.
Okay, let's see. Luke and Jack transitioned to big boy beds when they were 19 months and it was a piece of cake! They helped us take down their cribs which was a very interesting and long process. Then we put their mattresses on the floor and that was that. I actually think they were afraid to get out of bed because we had to go in and get them every morning. There they would be, sitting up on their beds and reading books.
Zoe was and is so strong willed that we were a bit worried about her staying in her bed. However, she was so excited to be like her brothers that her transition went smoothly as well. We transitioned her at 22 months.
For us what worked the best was making a HUGE deal out of it and letting them feel that they were helping us.
We do have a new bedtime problem and that is Zoe not wanting to be alone in her room. She thinks it is quite unfair that Luke and Jack get to sleep in the same room and Mommy and Daddy get to sleep in the same room, but she sleeps "all alone"! Bedtime can be quite a struggle some nights.
Hello,
This is my first time responding but I have been reading your blog for about a month, give or take, after my sister, Terah in comment #10, introduced me to it!
I have two boys,one 3.5 and one 1.5. My 18-month-old is still in the crib. My big boy has been in a big bed for over a year. Our transition was very easy because it was forced.
We bought a house just before our second was born and had decided to wait until we moved to put our oldest in a big bed. There was so much happening with the house, new baby, Christmas, and so on that we felt bad taking his bed away from him and the baby slept in a cradle in our room, so you know...
Oh, did I mention that we had to completely remodel our new home before we could move in? Well, after two months of paying house payment and rent and never seeing each other because my husband is a "do it yourselfer" and we couldn't hire someone to do it, we couldn't take it anymore. So we packed everything into our new basement and moved into a motorhome with our oldest sleeping on a bunk, with a rail of course, above us. He loved it! We didn't.
Anyway, we did this for six months and then FINALLY moved into out freshly remodeled home and he into his new bunkbed. We never had a problem. He just went to bed and stayed there from day one.
Now, nap time was a different story. That took a while.
Our second will be moving in with his brother probably this fall just before he turns two. I think we will try the play pen thing at first since they will be new to sharing a room.
Hi there, first time responder too, frequent visitor though Erin, found your blog through another aquaintance's blog (Carrie Marlin)when you did your first Mama Monday about Potty Training, she did a buddy post and I've been hooked ever since! My two year old, Brady is still in his crib but we are moving to a new house in 30 days and we are trying to decide about if and when to transition, I'm not sure if I want to mess with a good thing. But we have a new baby girl arriving in early December so we have that to consider too. Thanks everyone for posting on your experiences. Maybe an idea for another Mama Monday could be preparing your first child for the arrival of a second child! This topic is hot on my mind right now! Thanks!
Well, the Laughrey's failed at transitioning Kelsea out of the crib. But we are all now happier and less tired.
The first week went perfectly. She didn't wake up or get out of bed once. The three weeks following, she would wake up sobbing, and screaming outside her door several times a night. She sounded terrified.
So back into the safety of her crib she went. And there's been no more wake-ups since. Maybe when her toes are hanging through the slats of the crib we'll try again...
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